11/1/06: Another Day With the NBA

Excited about the return of the NBA? Forget about Lebron James and Gilbert Arenas for a second. Etan Thomas. Jarvis Hayes. Anderson Varajao. How about now? Brendan Haywood. Michael Ruffin. Eric Snow. Yeah, motherfucker. Whoo fucking hoo.

That Holiday Inn commercial where they are making humpback whale noises is amazing. Nature's public speaker, indeed!

Boise State on the blue field was what I was really excited about tonight. It has been entertaining. Boise is beating up Fresno early in the 3rd. The blue field is doing a fine job looking awesome. Oh, how I wish I could have run wild on that field during my psychadelic drug using years! What is really ruining the experience for me is Lou Holtz. Is this his first game as an analyst? His speech impediment and idiocy being forced upon you make you feel kinda...oh, I don't know, dirty? Like you're watching a great performance by a beautiful stripper on a pole and then the strip club dj guy comes on the loudspeakers with that voice. It cheapens the whole thing. Oh wow, half price lap dances? Well thanks for that info, buddy! Seriously though: Lou Holtz is a little bastard that needs to be fired. But he's Lou Holtz, a coach who won a national championship at fucking Notre Dame. They can't even get rid of Bob Davie. What needs to happen is for a male (or female, I suppose) intern at the world wide leader's headquarters in Bristol to come forward with accusations of Lou Holtz molesting him. Hell, it has probably already happened. Even better: A priest at Notre Dame could come forward saying that he was molested by Lou Holtz during the 1988 season.