The Foos is Aboot Democracy



Note: This is probably going to be the last post I ever do on political stuff. I'm primarily interested in sports, girls, alcohol, and issues relating to those three things such as smoking grass with girls. I really don't know why I decided to write this...it just sort of, like, happened and figured that this is the one day this year that I'll have a desire to write about this crap. I'm sure that some of what I have below is simply not true. Be prepared for factual errors.

Most everyone in my office is happy as can be today about all of the changes in the House and Senate and Rumsfeld stepping down. I'm certainly not upset. I recognize that we've gotten into a shitty situation by messing around too much with those camel fuckers in Iraq. We haven't been able to get eyeball-to-eyeball with the insurgents like we were with charlie (worthy fuckin' adversary). I guess I'm just sort of used to having lots of things fucked up in this country and am not convinced this change in control is going to magically fix everything that was
(1) fucked up by the Republicans directly, like invading Iraq on the WMD thing
(2) fucked up while they were in control that wasn't necessarily their fault, like organized terror threats on the US & A or
(3) fucked up when they took over control and never fixed, like oh I don't know....how about Social Security.

The Republicans are a weird group. I don't understand what logical connection there is between social conservatives (including bible thumpers) and fiscal conservatives (anti-government mountain men), but for some reason they formed like Voltron and were able to take over in the mid-90's.

I hate social conservatives who try to impose their social conservativeness on those who don't want it. If there isn't enough Jesus for you here, fire up the 2006 Mayflower and leave the rest of us the fuck alone. I have more sympathy for some fiscal conservatives, like my friend Dave and my parents, but I am extremely PRO-government for obvious reasons.

One thing that I will not forgive the Republicans for (and Democrats that were involved in supporting this) is throwing in the internet gaming ban into that port security bill. It reminded me of the NCAA national championship game between Duke and Connecticut in 2004. Like Duke near the end of that game, it was clear to everyone but the most hopelessly optomistic supporters that the Republicans were going to at least lose control of the House. Like Chris Duhon heaving a meaningless 3-pointer from near half court, they throw in this haterish ban into a bill that is sure to pass, because port security is actually important, to rally support from the dispicable Americans who would actually be pleased by it, but of course it wasn't really going to help them keep control of Congress. That's the kind of sentence that would piss off a 7th grade English teacher, I have a feeling. Sorry, Mrs Smith!

Anyway, good luck to all of you unemployed Republicans out there, and good luck to you incoming Democrats in finding an affordable house or apartment. I look forward to hating you for making the Capitol Lounge so crouded on wing night.