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Thursday, November 16, 2006

I Shot an 87 Today. You?
It was a good day in the 'hood. I woke up and ran a couple miles, played golf, then ate and drank a lot.
Football is clearly a great sport to park your big fat American ass down on the couch and watch. Other sports have their moments, but it's damn near impossible to really keep up with them during football season. Well, reader, I have done some research and now give you a fresh piece of news on the non-football portion of the sports world to keep us all well rounded people. You never know when it may come in handy.

Baseball: There is a pitcher named Daisuke Matsuzaka from Japan. This is him. Try to imagine that he is not wearing a glove and his forearms are leaning up against a wall.

Apparently the baseballs he throws are so difficult to hit with a bat that the Red Sox have paid $51.1 million just to negotiate with him. If you're not a soccer fan you are probably blown away by this. I hope that he has a 7.54 era in '07 and brings great shame to his country.

NBA: Alan Iverson is paying for the funeral of a 22 year old who was shot three years ago in SW Philly for not turning over his Iverson jersey to a pack of wild teenagers. This, unlike committing a crime against nature, is the kind of gesture that will boost your street cred. Way to go, AI, you're a good guy. I have never understood why people get murdered for not giving up jerseys or shoes. Maybe there is something satisfying about taking a big whiff of a sneaker you took from someone you just iced. This is why I rarely leave my home with my Pistons jersey on. I also don't want to get laughed at.

NHL: The Red Wings are 9-1 in their last 10 and 12-4-1 overall, which is good enough for first place in the Central Division of the Western Conference. The Buffalo Sabres and the Minnesota Wild are also in first place in their respective divisions. For most of my life, I have followed the NHL very closely. My freshman year of college I won four Red Wings playoff tickets by winning a "why I love the Red Wings" essay contest. Now I would be happy to see the regular season cut at least in half. How about a two month regular season, starting in January? Or how about another strike year?

NASCAR: Jimmie Johnson wins "the chase" if he finishes in the top 12 at Homestead in Miami. I used to hate NASCAR. Then I started watching it a little bit with my old roommates and made fun of it. Then I used to find myself flipping back and forth between a game and the race when they were out smoking. I ended up having a NASCAR coming out party last year. I was into it at the beginning of the year, but I have completely stopped following it since football started. I don't know if it's me living by myself or what, but I'm just not feeling the 'SCAR right now. Maybe I'll get my interest back next year when former f1 driver Juan Montoya is in it. It will also be interesting to see how all of the fans respond to Toyotas joining Fords, Dodges, and Chevys on the tracks.
"The noise is better than any piece of ass you'll ever have." -fan in my section at Pepsi 400

English Premier League: Didier Drogba is a badass. He scored a hat trick in his last match for Chelsea and has eight goals and three assists in 11 starts this season. He is a must-start in all fantasy formats.

That's all for today. I have to rest up for a big round of golf and possibly some swimming in either the ocean or a pool. Have fun at work.

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